Music Monday: Wheel in the Sky, Journey

Music, Music Monday

A classic from 1978 (circa: my novel Memphis), Wheel in the Sky by Journey is such a cool track. It’s one of the more philosophical Journey songs, telling the story of man trying desperately to return to his home. The verse lyrics are rather hazy, but the chorus offers an accessible metaphor for how life goes on no matter our personal struggles. Some would say the “wheel in the sky” is referring to the sun and others believe its about astrology.

I think of the Wheel of Fortune Tarot card more than anything when this song plays. The Wheel of Fortune tarot card signifies the constant spinning of life’s ups and downs. We get lucky breaks and we get life lessons -often disguised as bad fortune. One thing in life is certain, it keeps rolling.


Winter is here again, oh lord
Haven’t been home in a year or more
I hope she holds on a little longer
Sent a letter on a long summer day
Made of silver, not of clay
I’ve been runnin’ down this dusty road

Wheel in the sky keeps on turnin’
I don’t know where I’ll be tomorrow
Wheel in the sky keeps on turnin’

I’ve been trying to make it home
Got to make it before too long
I can’t take this very much longer
I’m stranded in the sleet and rain
Don’t think I’m ever gonna make it home again
The mornin’ sun is risin’
It’s kissin the day

Oh the wheel in the sky keeps on turnin’
I don’t’ know where I’ll be tomorrow
Ooo the wheel in the sky keeps on turnin’

Source: LyricFind

Songwriters: Diane T. Valory / Neal Joseph Schon / Robert Fleischmann

Sign up to receive updates by entering your email below

narcissists are snakes

Bizarre Things a Narcissist Does in a Relationship

Health, Relationships

Am I the only one who was looking for love but ended up a shell of my old self armed with a masters degree in narcissistic personality disorders? Whether you’re currently deep in a trauma bond with your narcissist or have recently found the courage to leave them and are in the healing stages (c-PTSD anyone?) you will relate to these bizarre things a narcissistic lover will do to you during your relationship with them.

The cruel ways of a narcissist come on only after the love bombing stage has worn off. They start letting their mask slip only when they know you’ve fallen deeply in love with them. It might take three months. It might take a year (in my case).

Narcissists are strategic two-faced snakes who will stop at nothing to hurt you to feel powerful -as if this is the only way to add some sort of meaning to their pathetic lives. Once I began noticing these odd habits of my nex lover, I took to Google and came across narcissistic personality disorder. He fit every box under the Covert Narcissist spectrum.

I was astonished that this was a real thing. Narcissists are snobby know-it-all’s who love staring at their own reflection but they are still people with a heart and conscious. After a five year relationship with one, I now wonder if these people even have a soul.

1. They cause chaos before important events & holidays

Special occasions are sure to be ruined by the narcissist in your life. They hate to see you happy and can’t wait to sabotage special occasions such as holidays, birthdays and anniversaries. Forget gift giving. They will either not get you a gift at all or get you something you didn’t ask for and throw a fit when you express your dissatisfaction. A perfect example; I wanted a simple gift for Christmas one year from my narc boyfriend. It was a bottle of Poison Girl perfume. That’s the only thing I asked for.

I even gave him tips and hints on where to get it at a reduced price. On Christmas morning, he proudly gave me an unwrapped box of five assorted knockoff perfumes. He actually smirked at my confused look upon seeing the no name bottles of perfume after numerous discussions of Poison Girl perfume.

He then opened one of his gifts; an Amazon gift card, and subtly complained that he wanted a Wish gift card. He specifically asked for an Amazon gift card! This behavior was never ending no matter how clear I made my expectations or how clear he made his. Gaslight much?

2. They smear your reputation

They smear your reputation every chance they get. The smear campaign is one of many abuse tactics all varieties of narcissists use on their supplies. Triangulation at its finest. They set you up from the beginning to paint themselves as the victim and you: the perpetrator.

They know the end game of your relationship together. They expect you to eventually call them out for the lying, the cheating, and the physical & emotional abuse when you just can’t take it anymore. They’ve been through the cycles many times before already.

So, like a game of chess, they will be ready to defend themselves when the time comes that you’ve had enough. When you start coming clean about how horrible they treat you behind closed doors, you’re gonna find out that many people will be shaking their heads in astonishment because the very claims you put on them are claims already circulating about you! Yup, all along they’ve been telling people stories of how much you cheat and mistreat them -all the things they’ve actually done to you! The nerve of these people!

3. They answer questions with a question

This frustrating tactic is used to deflect their transgressions and further confuse their victims. Seriously, there really is no straight answers from them. Since breaking it off with mine and noticing the other narc’s in my life, I am stunned to see they all do this at one point or another. This is called deflecting.

Deflecting is a painfully common tactic used by narcissists is divert and attack. Here, the goal is to shift attention away from what the narcissist is saying and doing to what you are saying and doing, where they never have to take responsibility for their toxic behavior or address anything you’re saying! Before you know it, you will be on the defensive and the one apologizing if you’re not careful.

4. They cheat with their exes and groom new supplies

The most obvious trait of a narc lover is their inability to remain faithful. They can’t turn down attention -its what they crave more than anything. The reason behind their infidelity varies by type. For a malignant narcissist; it’s to stroke their ego and the sheer enjoyment of being so cleverly deceptive. For the covert type; its to play the victim and garner sympathy for themselves; their only cheating because their partner treats them so poorly after all.

The end goal is always the same; an extreme need for attention or narcissistic supply. Whether positive or negative, attention is their main goal when sleeping around. Triangulation is another. They always have someone on the back burner lined up for your discard if you dare call them out for their questionable behavior.

Say no more and discard them first

Empathic people naturally draw narcissists to them. Your kind heart, and intuitive nature make you prime targets for them. I am lucky. I escaped. Once you leave one, they will stalk you, they will plead with you to take them back. They will threaten suicide. Anything is on the table if they can get their supply back and abuse you to their own enjoyment.

Work on yourself. Build your self esteem back up. Focus on your kids. Go no contact and take out a restraining order or peace bond if necessary – just do not let these energy vampires back into your heart or head space again!

Have you experienced these classic abuse tactics by a narc lover or family member? Did I miss anything? Comment below your experience or feedback.

Much love,

Holly May.

Sign up to receive new blog posts by entering your email below

3 Ways to Manifest Your Goals During a New Moon


Every month. the moon offers potent universal energy to bring in new opportunities, fresh vibes and amplified intentions with goal setting in mind. While a Full Moon is for releasing, a New Moon is for attracting. The new Moon today, March 2nd, 2022 is the perfect time to reassess your intentions for the upcoming moon cycle. Whether your goals relate to attracting a new partner, manifesting a new job or income source or hitting your fitness goals, the moon’s energy can be harnessed to hit those objectives with increased speed. Performing consistent moon rituals will set you up for success in life, love and luck.

The Moon cycles are notorious for making our emotions hit all time highs. It’s a scientific fact that the Moon controls the oceans tides. Women’s menstrual cycles are even believed to correlate with lunar cycles. Spiritual maven or not, there’s no denying the Moon’s impact on planet Earth or its inhabitants. The Moon’s planetary significance rules our emotions and illusions. It represents your emotional side, your feelings, intuition and memories. So how can you harness the potent energy by the new moon lunar cycle? Here’s three new moon ritual’s to do within three days of a new Moon. The day of is the most magical.

1. Write down your goals in a journal

The most simple and important thing to do during a new moon is to write! Write what you want to bring into your life during the month ahead. It doesn’t have to be tedious or elaborate. It should be fun. It can be as simple as journaling a list of anything you want to achieve. Think small steps. Asking to earn one million dollars during a new moon will only disappoint you. Create affirmations that are simple to recite and make notes of them in your journal alongside your goals. Writing your goals on paper should get you thinking and assessing where you are and where you want to be. The mere process of writing improves memory retention and impresses the words on your subconscious. Do this every month for a year and its much more likely that your 12 small goals will turn into one big overall achievement a year from now.

2. Start something new

A new moon is the perfect time of the month to begin something new. Whether your goals are of a personal or professional nature, you will move the needle on new projects much faster and more seamlessly during the new moon. Plant a tree. Go on a first date. Take a class or sign up for one around the new moon. Start your fitness routine or diet plan. Whatever your goals are, the most potent time to start something new and stick with it or draw it into your being is during this lunar cycle. The new moon is a time to plant seeds. Set intentions for how you want to feel and what you want to achieve by taking the first steps of intention.

3. Meditate & visualize your goals being achieved

Meditation is so important to our mental and spiritual well being. We should meditate daily. If you’re starting out, it’s best to at least practice meditation on and around the full and new moon cycles. Outside of these, practice mindfulness as a supplement to your meditation efforts. Don’t just sip your cup of coffee, feel the warmth of the mug in your hands. It’s that simple. Back to meditation specifically. According to the Mayo Clinic, the emotional benefits of meditation can include:

  • Gaining a new perspective on stressful situations
  • Building skills to manage your stress
  • Increasing self-awareness
  • Focusing on the present
  • Reducing negative emotions
  • Increasing imagination and creativity
  • Increasing patience and tolerance

Who doesn’t want more of these? There’s many excellent guided meditation video’s on YouTube that can be played before going to sleep at night. There’s guided manifestation meditations, third eye activation meditation, heart chakra meditations and many more. Find one that you resonate with and subscribe to that channel for new meditation video upload notifications. A key component to many meditation sessions is visualization. Visualize yourself buying that new house. Imagine walking into it, smelling the fresh paint, seeing all the details on your wish list before your eyes. Experience your goals being realized using all five senses to make the visualization the most effective. Hold the imagery in your mind’s eye for at least a minute and work up from there.

Final Moon rituals to practice

Your moon rituals do not have to be super witchy or elaborate. Keep it simple if you are just getting into manifesting using the moon’s lunar cycles. A few other things of importance during a new moon; deep clean and sage your home. I do this religiously during full and new moon cycles. Open your windows during a full moon to cast things out or to release what’s no longer serving you. During a new moon, pay special attention to your front door tidiness; wash your welcome mats, sweep, mop and tidy anything in your entryway to allow new opportunities in! Cleanliness is next to godliness.

Do you have any moon rituals not mentioned here? Drop a comment below.

Much love,

Holly May.

Sign up to receive new blog posts by entering your email below

Nurse or doctor gloved hand holding a vaccine needle

My First Covid-19 Vaccine Dose: An Anti-Vaxxer’s Perspective


I never wanted to get vaccinated against Covid-19. I didn’t see a need for it. I am in my thirties -fairly young, I don’t have any underlying health conditions and I’m not obese. Logic told me that the opposite groups of the latter are the ones who need the vaccine for protection; the ill and the elderly. But, the official narrative told me otherwise. Coming from all different directions. My neighbor. My extended family. My colleagues. My politicians. They all advised me repeatedly: “Get vaccinated!”. I held off as long as I could while numbing out opposing views and staying true to my own inner compass that told me I don’t need it.

I saw my friends and family catch Covid-19 and many compared it to a cold and breezed through it. A few got very sick and likened it to the flu but no-one I know that had caught it, were admitted to hospital and I never heard of anyone personally to die of it. Still I was more worried about getting a relatively new vaccine over catching a virus that has a 98% survival rate so I held off.

Low and behold, we come to find out that the initial promises of these very vaccines with 90-100% effectiveness upon launching have dwindled down to hardly any protection at all. Pfizer’s own CEO stated this on Twitter and advised everyone to get boosted as soon as possible to continue to be protected. I was happy I didn’t line up for a vaccine at the beginning of the rollout after seeing all these missteps by government and big pharma. Right before Christmas 2021, there was roughly 9,000 Covid-19 patients in Ontario hospitals and 7,400 of them were fully vaccinated! I knew I made the right choice and was sure that the mandates would end and we could get on with our lives and learn to live with Covid-19.

Government mandates set in

Effective on September 22, 2021 a province wide vaccine passport program took effect under the government of Ontario. I couldn’t take my children out to a restaurant, I couldn’t take them to a movie theatre and we couldn’t hop on an airplane which I would have done in the previous year and a half but the government advised us not too. It was tough considering all the lockdowns we had already gone through not to mention many shifts from in-person to online school which impacted everyone’s mental health. Now we couldn’t partake in any indoor activities until the pandemic numbers flattened.

With 88% of the Canadian population fully vaccinated at that point, I didn’t understand the need for this new radical mandate but was willing to sacrifice a few months of being excluded from society for better times ahead. The vax passport mandate was scheduled to end in January 2022 but it was extended indefinitely with a stronger barcode scanning system implemented instead of the original paper printed copies that were easily forged.

The government wasn’t messing around. They wanted to ensure the unvaccinated were excluded from society and that they felt the sting of their ‘morally wrong’ choice not to get vaccinated. I felt it. My kids felt it. With no end in sight and my workplace ever so patient with my vaccine hesitancy, I just couldn’t hold off any longer. I had to make a choice to get vaccinated or potentially lose my job and then what? Not be able to provide for my children as a single parent? I reluctantly made the choice to keep my job and just get vaccinated -a choice I deem incredibly unfair but one I had to finally face. On further thought, it wasn’t a choice at all but a backed into a corner type of entrapment. I will go so far to call it coercion, in fact.

My inoculation experience

Regardless, I got it. I requested the Pfizer vaccine. If there’s one I was comfortable with, it was Pfizer since this brand seemed to have less instances of blood clots or heart inflammation. It was February 1, 2022 when I walked into my appointment. On the eve of the New Moon. I was nervous, I sat in the chair anxious beyond words. The pharmacist spoke to an 11 year old who was scheduling his second dose with his dad. If he can do it with a smile, so can I.

I closed my eyes but felt her energy coming closer with the needle in her hand and I backed away and let out a scream. Seriously, I screamed in fear and then felt silly so I laughed nervously. She told me to stay still and relax. I took a deep breath and an instant later, she said “all done”. I didn’t feel a thing. For a moment, I thought I lucked out and got one of those anti-vaxx nurses who shoot the dose into the garbage next to you. A few hours later my arm started hurting. Damn it, she got me!

The after effects of Covid-19 vaccine dose #1

I was pleasantly surprised with the lack of worrisome side effects that never happened. I chalk this up to getting my mind right ahead of time. A week before my first dose vaccine appointment, my mindset was “I’m never getting it and I have a hundred reasons not too”. When I made peace with getting the Covid-19 vaccine since I had no other choice, I looked to the bright side.

I spoke to my dad, he had no symptoms from his first, second or third (cringe) booster shot. I spoke to my cousin who was also coerced into taking the jab to save her job but she also had no side effects from dose one or two. I can report a sore arm for a few days after my shot. I have also experienced lightheadedness over the last two weeks but other than these mild symptoms, I’m fine.

I had so much to gain from getting it. I was saying yes to keeping my income. I was saying yes to being included in society again. I was saying yes to have the ability to travel freely. I made the choice I had to make to provide for my children at the end of the day but If the mandates were not in place, I never would have made the same choice. Getting my first dose, is a bittersweet victory because my eldest child is 13 years old. I have no plans on getting her inoculated so visiting restaurants and going to see a movie at the theatre are not options for her. If she wasn’t so tall, she could pass for an 11 year old. Sigh.

The future is looking bright again

Yesterday, on February 14th, Premier Doug Ford announced that vaccine passport mandates in Ontario will be lifted effective on March 1st! This is incredible news and the best Valentines Day surprise I could ask for! Mask mandates will remain in place but I don’t mind, heck, I’ll wear a face shield if that means I can take my kids to the trampoline park again! I give thanks to Dr. K. Moore and Doug Ford but most importantly to the Trucker Freedom Convoy who played a huge part in shifting our government’s stance on harmful mandates like lockdowns and vaccine passports. Of which, only contribute to isolation, segregation and poor mental health in our communities. No one should be coerced into taking the injection under the threat of job loss or fully participating in society. Seeing steps being taken to finally get back to normal is music to my ears. Here’s to getting our livelihoods back!

Sign up to receive new blog updates by entering your email below.

Black Coffee with Sugar Cubes

Black Coffee is the Key to Sustainable Weight Loss

Food, Health

I recently made a very simple yet intriguing discovery about my underestimated sugar intake -a discovery that needs to be shared with the masses! If you have a few pounds to lose, I highly recommend you keep reading for two very impactful switches to your daily routine that will work wonders in maintaining a heathy body weight. My discovery happened about a month ago. I began a commitment to workout regularly in addition to my already established routine of getting a fair amount of fruits and veggies (love my salads) and drinking plenty of water throughout the day.

After adding four 40 minute strength and HIIT workouts, you’d think I’d start moving the digits down on my scale. But my scale didn’t budge. My weight stayed the same. I spoke to my doctor; is it my thyroid? Is it stress related cortisol holding my fat cells hostage? Seriously doc, what gives? He said its simply a matter of calories in and calories out and most importantly, cut down on sugary foods and junk foods. I don’t eat sugar aside from my coffee -not enough to cause concern nor do I eat junk food, I scratched my head.

Keep a food diary and measure every spoonful

I decided to keep a digital food journal through the MyFitnessPal app to track all my calorie intakes in case there was something I had missed -I even kept an eye on my macros with this nifty app. I started drinking more coffees than usual to support my workout sessions since black coffee aids in stamina and weight loss. But I can’t do black coffee. I drink a regular; one itty bitty cream and one spoonful of sugar -barely enough calories to interrupt my intermittent fast or disrupt my weight loss plans.

My morning routine consists of making two to three Keurig coffees and nothing else until 2:00pm when I break my fast. Aside from water, coffee is my go-to drink. When I started logging my coffee with the cream and sugar, I had a ah-ha moment when I went a step further and actually measured out the sugar and cream I was adding to my cup. Turns out my single teaspoons are more like two and my single cream was triple what I should have been logging.

Let’s do the math on these hidden calories

Let’s calculate the real nutritional values in my 3 cups of joe with two teaspoons of white granulated sugar per cup and three tablespoons of coffee cream.

2 teaspoons of sugar = 32 calories per cup plus 10 grams of carbs
3 tablespoon of 10% coffee cream = 45 calories per cup

That’s 96 calories and 30 grams of carbohydrates from the sugar and a whopping 135 calories from the creamer I was incorrectly measuring as only one tablespoon!

For perspective; you might as well have a McDonald’s cheeseburger to start your morning with 300 calories and 32 grams of carbs, it’s a mere 70 calories difference but at least the burger has 15 grams of protein!

Sugar & cream in your tea or coffee will cancel out your intermittent fast

Logging and measuring food portions are vital to any weight loss plan because its quite common and easy to miscalculate how much when you’re eye balling portion sizes and not using a proper measuring tool. Cutting out sugar is paramount to sustainable weight management. You cannot out-run a bad diet. Added sugar will sabotage any weight loss plans you have going for you. And interrupt a fasted state.

My intermittent fasting consists of a 19 hour fast and a 6 hour eating window or 19:6. Technically, you can have 50 calories to keep your body in a fasted state -that’s a splash of coffee cream or a teaspoon of milk in two cups of coffee. So I really wasn’t fasting at all, I was feeding my body with 230 empty calories and 30 grams of carbs every morning. Not good.

Rethink what you’re adding to your black coffee

I decided I had to make the switch to black coffee for my health. It was a matter of changing my palette over a couple weeks of time. I call myself a coffee lover but was I? No, I was a sugar addict. It took a week to adjust (wean) myself off the 25 grams of sugar I was accustomed to every morning. I got headaches, my stomach grumbled. I didn’t like the black coffee taste. I had to pivot. I started adding Stevia on day 3 of my black coffee trial run. Stevia is a sugar substitute made from the leaves of the stevia plant. It’s about 100 to 300 times sweeter than table sugar, but it has no calories and no carbohydrates. I also ditched the cream and opted for 2% milk instead – careful to measure it with an actual tablespoon measure. On day seven, I was down 3 pounds!

I was down another 3 pounds by day 14. I didn’t even workout in these two weeks nor did I change any other aspects of my diet. I wanted to single handedly assess the effect that my sugar addiction and coffee creamer had on my weight loss goals.

A 6 pound weight loss over two weeks was enough to wake me up and out of my sugar addiction. I am still using Stevia and a splash of milk -black coffee is the best way to go and its so simple to just brew and go -no measure spoons needed. But at this point, I’m much happier and healthier with my new morning java routine and don’t expect to lose much more weight from this simple diet change but it will definitely set me up in the long run against developing a range of sugar related health issues including type 2 diabetes, accelerated skin aging, cancer and more.

Plus, I feel better knowing I can have occasional sweets such as cake and desserts guilt free on birthdays and special occasions. It’s all about balance. I invite you to skip the sugar and creamer in your coffee (or tea) for a week or two while intermittent fasting and see the results for yourself. Comment below any experiences you’ve had cutting out sugar from your diet.

Much Love,

Holly May.

Sign up to receive new blog updates by entering your email below.

A Month Without My Mom


It’s been a month since God brought you home. It’s been a month since that deck collapsed while we cried in disbelief over losing you. It’s been a month since your dad died beside me mere hours after you. September 3, 2021 was -without a doubt, the worst day of my life.

Susan Jean Power with her Grandchildren

The circumstances surrounding my mom’s sudden death are strange. The out of ordinary occurrences before and after her passing has compounded my grief and pain. I can’t stop thinking about it all. She’s on my mind constantly. I am baffled by her absence as if I thought I’d have her beside me forever. She was 60 years old. Far too young to die. She was tough, kind, fun, exuberant.

My beautiful mother Susan Jean Power at 18 years old

She went through a hip replacement surgery ten years ago and felt like a new person and “…ready for the next fifty years.” of her life -I remember her saying. Then when she was 55, she overcame throat cancer. She persevered through Chemotherapy. She lost a ton of weight and most of her voice in the process. Removing the tumor during surgery damaged her voice box. This bothered her -she had an unfiltered gift of gab and a way with words throughout her life. She now had to learn to quiet her voice but at least it wasn’t lost forever.

My Mom at 25 years old with her fraternal twins

My mom and grandfather were close. When my grandmother Sandra died, my mom took over the care of her dad Charlie. She moved him in with us right before her throat cancer diagnosis.

He had a dog named Connie and Mom had a dog named Tiffy. The small dogs got along great for the many years they had them. Both of their dogs died weeks apart from each-other. Connie died first; of old age and Tiffy was put to sleep after breaking her neck weeks before my mom passed.

The day mom died was the worst day of my life and it couldn’t get any worse. Until night fell and I was proven wrong. My two brothers and my sister were all standing on the deck of my sister’s house with my grandfather. We got to the house about 4:00 pm – just missing the coroner leaving with my beloved mothers body headed for autopsy. After hours of reminiscing, storytelling and crying, we called it a night and at 9:00 pm (five hours of standing around on said deck) we started giving hugs and goodbyes.

I was standing at my twin brothers side watching him lean down talking closely with our grandfather. Before I could hug him one last time, the sound of wood crackling filled my ears and within a blink of an eye, I was on the ground. I screamed in pain, my left hip was under my grandfathers body and both of my legs were under panels of wood and a very large BBQ that fell ten feet down with us. The deck collapsed. I wiggled myself out of the rubble cutting my bare legs in the process.

I looked around and saw everyone was disoriented but conscious…except my grandfather. He was lying lifeless next to me. I knew he was gone. I froze, in complete shock suddenly unable to speak. My brother reacted quickly, he instructed my sister to hold up our grandfathers head while he performed CPR. He got him breathing before the paramedics arrived (many of whom were at this address earlier in the day tending to my mother). We all went to the Guelph hospital for our somewhat minor injuries. My grandfather was taken to Hamilton hospital.

Imagine a deck collapsing from 10 feet height with furniture, a BBQ and 6 people standing on it.
Cuts, scars and bone bruises from deck collapse accident

My sister broke one of her ribs while my hips and legs were full of cuts and bruises but no fractures or breaks thankfully. We rejoiced in this odd occurrence at the hospital in such a fragile state. We high fived my brother for reviving our grandfather. It was a strange day. We went home and tried to sleep with our battered bodies and broken hearts. We woke up to find out horrible news. Our Pa landed on his head when he fell. At 80 years old, he suffered a catastrophic brain bleed from the impact that would be unlikely even for a 20 year old to overcome. He also suffered organ damage from the impact of the fall and had ruptured the base of his spine at his neck when he landed. He wouldn’t be pulling through this. No-one could. He would be vegetable. Everything about Charlie that was Charlie would no longer be, even if his body survived miraculously -his brain wouldn’t recover. A week later, after many discussions with his doctors, we were at his bedside, reluctantly saying goodbye. He was going with Mom now.

My Grandfather Charlie Gratto

I got a tiny bit of comfort knowing that my grandfather was meant to go with Mom and they are together with my grandmother now but the whole sequence of events will unnerve me for a long time to come. I wonder if they had a pact before this life to leave together. I wonder a lot of things.

Rest in Paradise
Susan Jean Power March 8th, 1961 – September 3rd, 2021
Charles Keith Gratto March 23rd, 1941 – September 9th, 2021

Sign up to receive new blog updates by entering your email below.

Bob Seger and the Silver Bullet Band's Roll me away final tour

Music Monday: Old Time Rock and Roll, Bob Seger & The Silver Bullet Band

Music City, Music Monday, Seventies

In honor of World Music Day, I’m posting my all time favorite song: Old Time Rock and Roll. Originally released in 1978, the song was featured in the 1983 movie Risky Business starring Tom Cruise who gave an iconic coffee table dance clad in a white dress shirt.

Vivid memories are rolling in of my joker sister Suzy busting out a broom stick as her dance partner when this song started playing on the radio. What can I say, its our goofy sister song. Four decades after it’s release with no signs that I’ll EVER get sick of hearing it.


Just take those old records off the shelf
I’ll sit and listen to ’em by myself
Today’s music ain’t got the same soul
I like that old time rock and roll

Don’t try to take me to a disco
You’ll never even get me out on the floor
In ten minutes I’ll be late for the door
I like that old time rock and roll
EverybodyOld time rock and roll
That kinda music just soothes the soul
I reminisce about the days of old
With that old time rock and roll, Drew Abbott!

Won’t go to hear ’em play a tango
I’d rather hear some blues or funky old soul
There’s only one sure way to get me to go
Start playin’ old time rock and rollCall me a relic, call me what you will
Say I’m old fashioned, say I’m over the hill
Today’s music ain’t got the same soul
I like that old time rock and roll

Still like that old time rock and roll
That kinda music just soothes the soul
I reminisce about the days of old
With that old time rock and roll

Old time rock and roll
Baby, just soothes the soul
I reminisce about the days of old
With that old time rock and rollEverybody come on
Old time rock and roll
Baby, just soothes the soul
I reminisce about the days of old
With that old time rock and roll

Old time rock and roll
It just soothes the soul
I reminisce about the days of old
With that old time rock and roll
It’s not like the old time rock and roll

Alright Alright Alright, just one more

Source: Musixmatch

Narcissistic abuse warning that reads "Love shouldn't hurt"

3 Early Warning Signs of a Narcissistic Lover

Memphis Novel, NPD, Relationships
Narcissistic Abuse skull

The early days of a new relationship is usually filled with joy, butterflies and adventures. With all that fun, it’s easy to get carried away with someone who makes you the center of their world quickly. Let’s not throw all caution out the window though -the first date or two is the best time to lay out boundaries with your potential future significant other. You are in charge of your happiness and sanity after-all.

Narcissistic personality disorder involves a pattern of self-centered, arrogant thinking and behavior, a lack of empathy and consideration for other people, and an excessive need for admiration. Others often describe people with NPD as cocky, manipulative, selfish, patronizing, and demanding.

According to, Narcissistic Personality Disorder effects nearly 6% of the population and narcissist abuse effects over 158 Million Americans annually. Don’t let yourself be a statistic! Know the signs and educate yourself with the three early warning signs of narcissistic abuse below.

1. Love Bombing

Love bombing is the practice of showering a person with excessive affection and attention in order to gain control or significantly influence their behavior. The love bomber’s attention might feel good, but the motive is all about manipulation.

Multiple texts or calls throughout the day and early proclamations of love are warning signs that you’re being love bombed -possibly by a person with NPD. Affection, flattery, gifts and praise in generous amounts that scream to good to be true is a sure sign that you might dealing with a narcissist.

2. Gaslighting

Gaslighting is a means to manipulate someone by psychological means into questioning their own sanity via their memory, judgement or perceptions. Gaslighting is used by narcissists to sow seeds of doubt in their victims so they question their reality. The results can be catastrophic to a person’s self esteem and confidence leading to second guessing yourself, apologizing often and an overall feeling that everything you do is wrong.

If you find your date tells you that you remembered something wrong more than once or repeatedly disagrees with your opinions, that’s not normal behavior; its a sign a narcissistic abuse. Cut ties now.

3. Triangulation

Triangulation is “a psychological threesome that you didn’t consent to..” according to Triangulation is when a toxic or manipulative person, often a person with strong narcissistic traits, brings a third person into their relationship in order to remain in control. There will be limited or no communication between the two triangulated individuals except through the manipulator. It may appear in different forms, but all are about divide and conquer, or playing people against each other.

For example say, things have going well in your new relationship and you are invited to meet his friends or family. You make introductions but something is off. Your gut is telling you that maybe you’re not welcome or the friends or family members aren’t as warm as you’d hoped for. Trust your gut! If any of his friends or family members give you sneers or frowns upon first meeting -he’s already started his smear campaign against you!

Fold and move on, before you get in too deep.

Trust me.

Much love,

Holly May.

Sign up to receive new blog updates by entering your email below.

Tammy Wynette's photo on the Womenhood album cover

Music Monday: Stand by Your Man, Tammy Wynette

Music Monday

It’s been a while since I’ve posted a song for Music Monday – I’ve decided to only post these on the last Monday of the month going forward. Life gets busy and I’m also curating content on topics of importance to readers of Memphis; music, domestic violence and alcoholism, among others. The songs posted previously are ones mentioned in my novel and so is this one.

This is the track that Memphis reluctantly sings to her husband Johnny during a singing competition at the beginning of the novel. It seems like a love song -a tune of unwavering devotion. But I’ve always found it to be a sad song advising to consider that “..he’s just a man” and to “forgive him” because he’s “..doing things that you don’t understand.” A ballad for married woman to stand by your man even if he cheats because he’s just a man and well, he just can’t help himself. My thoughts on this song really drove the creation of the singing competition scene.

Tammy Wynette was the original co-writer of this classic tune. My grandmother played this when I was a kid and it stuck with me for years somehow bringing out Deja Vu years later when I heard it on the radio and Shazam-ed it. Then and there it became apart of my novel -before I even began the first draft. “Stand by Your Man” has been redone by the band formerly known as “The Dixie Chicks”, now simply known as “The Chicks”. The Chicks remake is a contrasting upbeat version of the original and I highly recommend you listen to it.


Sometimes it’s hard to be a woman
Giving all your love to just one man.
You’ll have bad times
And he’ll have good times,
Doin’ things that you don’t understand
But if you love him you’ll forgive him,
Even though he’s hard to understand
And if you love him oh be proud of him,
‘Cause after all he’s just a man
Stand by your man,
Give him two arms to cling to,
And something warm to come to
When nights are cold and lonely
Stand by your man,
And show the world you love him
Keep giving all the love you can
Stand by your man
Stand by your man,
And show the world you love him
Keep giving all the love you can
Stand by your man

Source: LyricFind
Released: 1969
Genre: Country

Sign up to receive new blog updates by entering your email below.

Five nearly shirtless members of the Eagles band in the early 1980's

Music Monday: One of the Nights, The Eagles

Music Monday, Seventies

This is another song featured within my novel Memphis. No spoilers here -I’ll just say it’s in the book and leave it at that. This came out in 1977 the year my novel takes place in and years before my birth. My father is a guitarist so my childhood home always had classic rock roaring through the house. Enjoy.


One of these nights, one of these crazy old nights
We’re gonna find out, pretty mama, what turns on your lights
The full moon is calling, the fever is high
And the wicked wind whispers and moans
You got your demons, you got your desires
Well, I got a few of my own Oh, someone to be kind to in between the dark and the light
Oh, coming right behind you, swear I’m gonna find you, one of these nights

One of these dreams, one of these lost and lonely dreams, now
We’re gonna find one, mm, one that really screams
I’ve been searching for the daughter of the devil himself
I’ve been searching for an angel in white
I’ve been waiting for a woman who’s a little of both
And I can feel her but she’s nowhere in sight

Oh, loneliness will blind you in between the wrong…

Source: LyricFind

Sign up to receive new blog updates by entering your email below.